Raven's Scerets
by Raven-Talent
Summary: Everyone of Raven's secrets. No matter how painful they are. R&R Rated T for violence
1. Heal

_Author's Note:_

_This was an idea I had a little while ago, and I've been thinking of it a lot lately, so yeah. This is going to be the first installment of 'Raven's Secrets'. Enjoy. _

_Also, read and review. It'd be very appreciated. _

**Heal**

He lay there, still and quiet. It wasn't normal for him. She could see each welt and the scratches clearly on his green skin. His breathing was horrible, rasping for each and every breath. Cinderblock.

The Titans had been having a normal night. Robin was going over files, with Star Fire was trying to coax the Wonder Boy to take a break. He had been running out of excuses why he couldn't stop. Raven could feel his emotions clear across the room.

Cyborg and Beast Boy were engrossed in a new Mega Monkeys addition, the eleventh one. Beast Boy had gotten it for his seventeenth birthday. His gaming skills had gotten better over the years, and now he was a hard opponent of Cyborg to take down.

Raven was looking at a book. It was special to her. A dark blue cover and yellowed pages. Songs and stories of Azarth spilled over the pages in purple ink, and pictures spirals from spaces in a haunted style. It was her's. Her keep sake of her home. She had spent months laboring away, working on it until it was, what she thought, perfect. Something to remember her home by, the one that was reduced to rubble.

And then, the siren went off.

They leapt into the T-Car, driving recklessly, straight to Jump Cities Pentagon.

Straight to Cinderblock.

From there, at the moment when Robin yelled the familiar catch phrase that had been engrave don each of the fives heart –though Raven never wanted to admit it-, they leapt into battle. Cyborg began firing his canons, intent on bringing Cinderblock down. Robin was hurling his birdarangs with little effect. Star Fire flew circles around the enemy, bringing green fire bolts down upon him. She had as little affect as a mosquito had. Raven however was sent straight to defense. Hurling force fields left and right, protecting her team mates from impact of heavy machinery.

Beast Boy, grown reckless with the Cat-and-mouse battle, charged into a rhino, and started to charge. Before Raven could even chant her words, he was thrown backwards hard. He phased directly human, and before Raven had another chance, Cinderblock threw metal beams and sacks of cement at the green changeling, until Raven managed to create a force field, and force him to relent the attack.

Cinderblock began running away, awkwardly but with a purpose.

It was silent, driving back.

Until Robin broke it.

He blamed her. blamed her for falling back on her duties, blaming her for not coming to Beast Boy's aid, not only once, but twice! He blamed her for allowing him to escape.

She said nothing, but pulled her hood up and shutting her eyes. Emotions were raging inside and timid stood among them all, crying.

The rest of the ride was tense, waiting for something to happen.

Nothing but the harsh sounds of Beast Boy's breathing.

In the Hospital wing of the Tower, Raven began to pull herself together. Rubbing her hands together, she began to focus. Pushing aside her emotions, she began to breath calmly. Placing her hands on his chest, they were soon engulfed in a soft glow.

Within moments his breathing was better. Her's was worse.

His cuts began to disappear; red lines appeared on her skin.

His bruises faded away; purple splotches came onto her arms.

And then, he was healed.

With her hood up, she stumbled away, ignoring the others gazes.

Cyborg was worried of course. The 'Protective Brother' role he had begun to play was strong. Stare Fire was concerned. She had no idea why Raven looked so weary underneath her cloak and hood. Robin's was empty. He felt guilt for yelling at her, and something was wrong with her.

Before anyone could say a word, Beast Boy's eyes opened. They rushed towards him, coddling him –though Robin was only concerned for the team, even if part of that team was gone-.

They never saw the after affects of her 'healing'. She could heal other's-no matter the extent of the injury- and it would take it's place on her. Broken ribs made each breath burn, and tears pricked her eyes.

It was only if someone had injured her were they gone. Like when the Beast came, she healed. But now, she could only sink to the floor and wait for the morning.

_A/N:_

_And that, my lovely readers (and hopefully reviewers), is Heal. My next installment will be GONE. This is when Raven ran away, and her fears of a new world. _

_So adios amigos, happy reading!_

_Raven-Talent_


	2. Gone

_Thanks guys for all the awesome reviews, those made my day! So, get ready to click the review buttons, because, here is the new installment of Raven's Secrets :)_

_And, if it's not too much to ask, I have another story; a one shot which is awesome by the way, called Pain. Or, The New Class. Could you guys check it out? Please?_

**Gone**

It had been years since Raven had even looked at the little picture. It was hidden, deep inside her chest, waiting to be taken out, and to be looked at. But she never could. Hatred and resentment would take hold of her, bringing up past memories.

When Raven had been born, her mother had been prone to neglecting her. She was Satan's spawn. She blamed Raven for what she could not control. The Density. The Prophecy.

Across her back was a long and jagged scar. It was what remained of being thrown through a window when she was only ten.

She had only asked if she could go to Church, like the other Azarthins.

She had left that night, creating a portal and ending up in New York. She was Gone. No one ever looked for her, it wasn't worth it. They wanted her gone. They never wanted her in the first place. Who would? She was the one to blame, the fault of everything to come. She was blamed for being born, and for being her. With the dark powers that had developed in her, every emotion was like a time bomb, waiting to be set off.

She ran from demons and humans, not understanding the concepts of Earth. Cars, the noise, the people… it was all too much.

So, she found refuge in a library.

Full of old looking books, she spent hours, just reading. The smell of the worn books and of age and knowledge soothed over her, bringing her stories of the world. She read everything. From fables to poetry to history… anything. Even in other languages. She was desperate, so to say. She needed to know this strange new world, and leave the one she had left from.

Gone.

It was the word that had struck in her mind all those days. She starved, but began taking her meals at Soup Kitchens. Her powers became more calm and precise. She slept secretly behind the Book Stacks, reading late into the night. A librarian would come over every so often and either give her a cup of hot herbal tea which she soon devolved a taste for, or to recommend books for her. The librarian never seemed to notice her age when she began recommending medical journals and such to the small girl.

She lived two years of solitude. Reading. Developing an understanding of the world she had gone to.

But she was still terrified. She would end this brave new world, a world of thousands of different customs, of different ideas and dreams. All on the day of her birth.

She loathed her existence then.

She still did in a way.

She never went back. She never went and checked Azarth, looked for her mother's body. Checked for the Monks. She was still scared.

They never bothered to look for her. They all hated her. She remembered walking through the smooth streets, and hearing the whispers of hate. Every glance was filled with scorn, and as a child she did not fully understand why they all despised her. And now, she did.

The realm of Azarth has fallen, all because she was the portal, the one they had all mocked and ridiculed. If only they could see earth though, standing in all its glory. When they doubted her, abused her, and left her for death, so survived. And the city of light, of perfection fell to its knees at Trigon's wrath.

She had her life in front of her. She had her choices now. And now, she was lost.

Inside her chest, so close to her-but yet so far away, was a picture. A picture of her mother.

_A/N:_

_My next story will be called CUT, but this was actually a mix of two of my ideas. And if you lovely readers noticed, I added how Raven got obsessed with herbal tea. So yeah. Review lots, and I'll give you guys another chapter. _

_Also, CUT will be based on a part of my other story, called Pain. So, you might wanna check it out…_

_I'm desperate. _


	3. Cut

**Cut**

Black blood stained her pale grey skin, reminding her of her flaws. Black like demons blood- not red, like humans were. Or her mother's.

The blood was black, full of sin and deceit. It was a demon's heritage. Every demon bleeds blackness and shadows, of sin and hatred. It was their nature. And it was her's as well. A mix. A blend. A hybrid. That's all she was. A freak of nature. She stood out from the rest, from Starfire's alien beauty-the long red hair, her dazzling eyes. She couldn't compare to that. Everyone knew that. 'Demon destroyer' she was declared by the humans she strived to protect.

Smooth, perfect cuts lurked upon her skin, everyone holding some sort of sin. Greed. Hatred. Destruction. She was a demon child through and through. It was always with her, her rage. She couldn't escape it. No matter how hard she chanted, forcing every emotion to fade away-just for a little while at least.

In one world she would be considered a princess. Perfect and deathly. In the other world, she was called a mistake. Full of flaws and doom. And here, she was just a Titan trying to pass life away.

Every cut she made was for a reason. She had to shut herself off to keep a barrier between her emotions. She had to feel cold in order not to cause any more pain than what was necessary. And she hated it. She wanted to be able to get mad, and to scream it out. She wanted to smile, and laugh at _his _jokes. She wanted to be at peace with herself. She wanted to be free, able to fear with no destruction. So cutting herself she was able to feel. She could feel pain, with no destruction. Rage was satisfied, and her emotions were muted. She could be in control.

So it was an endless cycle. She would heal her arms just before she passed out, and would be left with tiny, faint scars. No one ever really noticed-she was known for disappearing for hours-days even. It was enough time for her to allow her emotions to die down, and focus on what really mattered.

Like not destroying the world.

She felt guilt slowly eating her soul, taking a hold of her, strengthening her demon side. Her human nature was starting to die away, allowing her to become more aggressive, harder in fights. Everyone was getting worried now. She could hear them, whenever she paused by a door. Cyborg asked Robin if she was alright, and if Robin had found out yet. Beast Boy knocked on her daily-but never got anything other but silence. The only one, who never tried, was Starfire.

Burns that left scars that she lacked the ability to heal littered her skin. They mingled in with her cuts, proving to her that she did not belong. If an alien saw such a thing, an out sider to the human race, and accepted so grandly-why would a demon child be accepted, one that would destroy the world?

**A/N: Sorry it's so short! I just finished my math exam, and now I'M WAITING for my friends to get their butts down to student services. I've been busy last night, and so, forgive me because it's small. I'm going to pick up this chapter where it left off, and it'll be called BURN. By the way, forgive me Star Fire fans, but she's gonna be an evil in this fic. I'm debating with pairing Raven off with either Robin or Beast Boy. What do you lovely guys think? (Or girls.)**

**So, RR!**

**RAVEN-TALENT**


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